What are you doing?

Heart Attack Time! Glitch Mob and me are having a study sesh.

Things I've done- 1 exam down!
- got a prom date
- got a dress
- went to a bonfire
- created most excellent tan lines
- made new friends
- had some good iced tea
- switched to film

Things to do - 4 more exams!
- tattoo/ nose ring (yikes)
- learning how to play lax
- get better at guitar/ tambourine

Senior night!
And even better, I got my first goal of my soccer career! May I say I did some sweet fist pumping action right after it.
I have a new idea for when we run sprints is to just do it like your flying, arms out, as fast as possible.

I can't wait to get back to college. I can't wait to get my ass outta town.

AP Art History Exam this week. Whoo- Hoo.

I'm making a serious switch to biking into school now that morning classes are done. I just don't want to get smashed by a truck.

Every time is a reunion!

When I get back to blogging! Only a month since last time. Like one of those vacations where you never leave and you find Northerners that were once pale and rich in their house in Massachusetts now slouchy and brown and driving taxis in some South Floridian neighborhood and it makes you want to stay forever.

TOO MUCH MONTH TO TALK ABOUT

and then again, should I talk about it

muah muah muah

On my Spring Break I laid on my friend's brother's bed real [ ] and watched The Boondock Saints. .

If ever there was a classier movie, full of badassery and gun walloping madness...
Only ironically classy

But the next day, with a clearer head I sat in Tea Bazaar.
This being 4.21
clearly people thought I was recovering
BUT! really it was just from sleeping on the floor!
{I looked tired}
And I got these knowing nods from the guys that passed by. But I am too silly and shy to return c'mon/acknowledgment? nod.

Gah, and I saw Picasso/ rode in the back of a truck through Richmond.

Has anybody considered how hipster Richmond has grown to be??
So proud of it right now, someone should have told me sooner.

Currently reading: On The Road (please take me West, brother)
Silent Spring -shock value
(some non fiction shit for English)
Omnivore's Dillema
All My Friends Are Dead -short read


I'm a goner.
I'm a goon.

She knows which birds are singing

And the names of the trees where their performing

In the morning

_______________________________________________

When I am in Spring I feel--

Lukewarm

How much rejection can a body endure? How much can a body take?

If a body catch a body...

So, for the past week I've tried to fill my life with a little inspiration and take in things a little slower. The art of doing a little shy of nothing.

Laying in fresh cut grass.
Sitting outside drinking a coffee.
Watching things alone.

It's not distracting me from my bitter attitude towards life.
If you know me, you know why.
If you know why, you know how.
If you know how, you know when.

When being a week ago.

Damn, stings.
I took a little while to blog, to just take a little time and not blog. To not blog and to be calm. Because what could more ridiculous than angry blogging? Angry tweets, perhaps.

I just want to dance myself clean.

Da da dawwwnnn towwwwnnn

Free days! Free days! I get to dance today!

But I have bio tomorrow.

Shucks!

I love seeming cool to little kids. I was playing street soccer with some little kids and then before that we drew faces on birthday balloons and they had these astonished looks on their faces. Like, "Whoa, you relate to us".

And, I must not have lost my childhood, somewhere in between being too cool to be a kid and wanting to grow up so hard. I retained it.

But, then it's weird, the freshman on the team are really un-candid, uh-- formal, with me. They're like-- "Good practice, Kate".

--Do I not relate to anyone, or do I just seem like I'm on my own planet all the time.

I have different tastes, I guess.

_____________________________________________

I made a list of all the things I want for the rest of the year. But, it's mine. I'll share it if you ask.

"I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in."

You Guys Are News To Me

Meh, Creative Writing Class, you have doomed me!
I can't write a play.
Plays have a completely different set-up than normal writing.
You have to SAY everything.
I am, very bad with dialogue.
If my characters were real people, they would be the kind of kids you stick in the trashcan.
Just cause it's easy, ya know?

I haven't been home on a weekend in ages. It's been really bad.
I WORK on the weekends. And I yoga. What am I supposed to do.

Anyway...

I'd just like to throw out the fact that...

THERE ARE 55 DAYS 'TIL GRADUATION

geh siked, geh geh geht siked!

I'm actually not excited. Except for April 1st.

We had our first thunderstorm today, in March.
And whenever we have a thunderstorm, my 90 pound lab, my protector of the house, the beautiful KILLAH... turns into a mass of furry Jell-o. She quivers and whimpers and rolls around on her back like some ANIMAL. And, she isn't an animal, she is expressive and has a vocabulary.

WOOF- I want in!

WHINE- I want out!

GRUMBLE- Hungry, feed me now, bitch.

Soccer has been taking up my time. I luvr it, I reallah doo.

My mom has her 50th birthday next week. So, if you see my mom, run up to her and flash her. She's old and would beat you with her cane.

Just kidding...my mom doesn't have a cane.

She has a chainsaw.

I wonder how many bananas you can eat in one day without getting physically sick?

Talking about MOMs, does anyone remember MILF.

What other things would ILF?

Dolphin skin.

A jet stream.

Empathy.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

YOU LOOK AND SMELL LIKE MONEY

Word.

Redemption.

First--

Click HERE

It will lead you to youtube, and music.

Then start the link. Let it load. Don't let it pause in the middle of meditation. That always throws my zen off.

No, it is not about Red Dead Redemption.
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Remember those night runs, with headlights bouncing, as the summer's humidity pushed beads of sweat through your skin, only to cool in the darkness of night?

The frogs choke near ponds and in gardens and the woods are lush with their noise.

People appear out of their houses later into the evening, voices call out and hang like slow falling fireworks.

It feels good to lay in bed, no covers on, and feel night air on your skin after a brutal day.

The moon seems always full and savory, like apple pie.

Nights when you find yourself wandering and pulled into shops where music plays and its bluegrass. Where the food is always fine and fresh and growing a few miles away.

The clarity of sky and the freshness of water as you plunge into it.

Spring, come sooner.

Indian Summer

In a day the crocuses are in full bloom.
Opening pretty yellow eyes to the sky.
They are the size of toes.

In a couple days everything will bloom.

In an Indian Summer.

"Don't let the darkness eat you up."

A handwritten note, tacked to a tree.

I weave the horse down the slope, muddy, and rolling in grass, sweet with a new sunny warmth. The bones under my legs heave and muscles bend. I give the horse her head as she weaves through broom straw down to the paths edge, lined with tiny sycamores. They shed their skin in papery slips, and I tear one as I pass by and tuck it in my pocket to write notes on. I pass by two mated hawks sitting high in an oak in the forest later, their massive white feathered breasts unsettled in the graying light. Two other hawks fly by, chased by a flock of crying crows. Crying because they've hunted their mates out of the sky. The clop and sighs of the horse under me give way as she startles and takes off, gathering the massive body under me and leaving me to gather the reigns.

A glass jar of tulips sit on my counter.
Mason jars litter the rest of the space.
Winter seeps under the doors and chills the floors.
It will not release the reigns yet.

Typical.

I hate the way you talk to me,
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car,
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick,
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you’re always right,
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh,
Even worse when you make me cry
I hate it when you’re not around,
And the fact that you didn’t call
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,
Not even close…
Not even a little bit…
Not even at all

I find the greatest satisfaction in not pledging loyalties.
I'm flighty.
Unfocused.
Self-interested.
Abusing.

But, it's really just rare that my attention is held, past the three seconds.

Maybe that's why everything fell apart in such blazing impossibilities.

Impossibilities. Things we didn't believe would happen.
They did.

Shrug.

There's someone new.
I keep them at arms length.
As, I do most.
The people that are closest don't have any direct stake in my life, usually.
I'm afraid of their judgement.

But, there's still the same beat within me. Fun, caring, if just jaded.
I admit:
Self-Interested.

Do you feel melancholy?
I don't.
I can't be tied down. Not for long, too long.
And, that's why I had to go.

I have someone new.
Keeping them at arms length, just as I should have you.
Happy Valentines Day.
God Bless.

Singled Out.

Body Is A Cage

FUCK YOU BLOGSPOT, DELETING MY POST WHEN IT'S ALMOST PUBLISHED, WATCH ME SWITCH TO TUMBLR

Constant Companion.

So, creative writing class this semester, I will totally take you on. I will climb your remarkably easy curriculum and I will stand atop that high mountain of success with one hand shielding my eyes from the penetrating rays of being SO DAMN HIGH UP and use one hand to hold a shovel to take on my next task- Digging through the Earth to an Indo-European country.

I've been trying to think about how I should sum up what I've been doing all this time while not blogging.

*taps chin pensively*

*waits a few minutes*

*makes a sandwich*

*remembers English paper is due tomorrow*

Returns.

Not much. Other than pickin' fights, celebrating black history month, and reading books about sassy generals. Perfecting my coffee making skills, swimming, yelling sweet nonsensicals and throwing yoga balls at people.